Ohio Congressman Embarrassed Over Nazi Flag Found In Office

Last week, U.S. Rep. Dave Taylor joined the hallowed ranks of people caught with embarrassing shit in the background while on a Teams meeting for work. Taylor immediately issued a statement acknowledging the gaff, providing the following statement exclusively to Risky.Kitchen.

“It has come to my attention that a staffer of mine was caught on camera with a deplorable perversion of the Amercian flag hanging on their cubicle wall this past week. I want to assure the people of Ohio and the American people at large, that this terrible symbol does not represent myself or my beliefs. I mean, c’mon, a multi-colored swastika in the middle of the stripes? Gross.”

“Look, I’ve been rewatching The Man In the High Castle recently, you know, to help brainstorm ideas. And one thing that that show drives home is that if you’re going to put a swastika on the American flag, you make it white and you put it in the Union. I suppose if you absolutely had to have it in the middle, you could remove the Union entirely and put it on like a blue circle or something, but that’s a bit of a stretch. I don’t know, I’d have to consult the manuals.”

“People, the Third Reich was a lot of things that we in the GOP are now desperately trying to emulate, but one thing they were not was fashion illiterate. What would Hugo Boss say if he saw that flag? The swastika isn’t even angled correctly. Technically, that flag is some kind of Buddist Pride American flag and I find that thought as disgusting as you do.”

“Believe you me, there will be an investigation. We will get to the bottom of this. The people of Ohio deserve better and we will be better. Better nazis. Ok, that’s all I’ve got. The government is still shutdown so I’ve got a really full day of posing in Carhartt jackets while holding a kitted-out AR-style rifle. You know, politician shit.”